i (i) wrote,

a lifetime ago...

did it mean nothing?

i have been used, lied to, and abandoned, yet i still look for her emails, wonder if it's her when the phone rings, and do a doubletake whenever a little red car comes down the street. i go over everything that has happened every day, looking for a way to believe that i wasn't used, lied to, or abandoned. i can't find it. then i see this picture. the truth behind this image is what she ran from, what she is hiding from, what she has damaged so badly that i don't believe it can survive.

no need to respond, you have all been kind, eloquent, perceptive, and helpful in response to previous posts.

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