I've been trying to figure out why the death of a little puppy that I had for about a month has been so much harder to deal with than the deaths of my grandparents, who were an integral part of my life for years. I think it is the fact that pita was totally dependent on me and had complete trust in me, and I essentially let her down. I can see that face looking at me, well you get the idea. I'm not beating myself up over this any more, but it is going to be a long time healing.