1 - i already had high speed service, so this is not an issue of changing from dialup.
2 - cox told me i had to change the SMTP server, probably for the reasons someone mentioned, spammers etc.
3 - that still didn't work, instead of a connection timeout message, i now get a connection refused message for both outgoing and incoming mail. in other words, i can't receive it either now.
4 - i tried changing the SMTP server back and i still get the connection refused.
5 - all the error messages, even when i was using their SMTP server, said the client was trying to contact farbelism.com.
6 - cox doesn't support eudora or outlook, only outlook express, so they refuse to help me. ( i don't have or want to have outlook express)